There is More to See

Matthew Vire • April 1, 2022

What Else Would We See if We Chose to Look?

I lost a dear friend in late 2017 to ovarian cancer. She was vibrant, inspiring, kind, and extraordinarily beloved. She helped people discover their creativity, believe in themselves, and see themselves as artists. We who knew her still feel the void of her absence. And yet the loss of her also brought with it unexpected grace. When we gathered to celebrate her life, tell stories of our time with her, laugh, and cherish our memories of her, we looked deep into our grief and found our Love staring back at us. We saw this Love because we did not look away from the pain of our loss but leaned into it with eyes and hearts wide open. As a result, we experienced not only our grief but magnificent gratitude as well.

When we see something displeasing -- however we may define it -- and commit to our own judgment of what we would rather not accept, we attach ourselves to a limited perspective. We can only see what we wish to reject from this limited place, no matter what else may be present. However, our perspectives need not be fixed, and we can look again. Maybe some ugliness will always remain, but that is rarely all there is. As the Dalai Lama has said, "Attachment constrains our vision so that we are not able to see things from a wider perspective." How might we see things if we seek different perspectives whenever life challenges us?

There is a story of van Gogh buying a pair of shoes in a flea market and wearing them through the mud of Parisian streets for some time. He would later paint them –– dirt, scuffs, and all. Van Gogh sought -- and found -- the presence of beauty in places and things we often consider mundane or even ugly.

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